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NFP: Throwing Down The Gauntlet

NFP Awareness Week, not unlike NFP (natural family planning) is one of the Catholic Church’s best kept secrets. Memo to Dan Brown: I think you could come up with a…

NFP Awareness Week, not unlike NFP (natural family planning) is one of the Catholic Church’s best kept secrets. Memo to Dan Brown: I think you could come up with a great story here. This might be bigger than your tired Da Vinci Code.

Several years ago, I was asked to do a radio interview about NFP Awareness Week at the end of July. I hadn’t even heard of it. I was convinced that the host of the show was wrong because, after all, who would run an awareness campaign during one of the slowest news cycles of the year? Ha. I was wrong. Still, I wasn’t even sure that anyone was listening to radio shows in the midst of summer vacations and other fun activities.

Meanwhile, at the USCCB homepage, there was no mention of it.

And there’s no mention of it this year, either. If you dig a bit, you’ll find it in the pro-life section here. Ah, yes, awareness.

At the time, I contacted the Pro-Life Secretariat of the USCCB to share both my concerns and my support for the endeavor. But they’re still using the same strategies.

Which brings me to a great post by Ashley E. McGuire. She writes:

We need more than an awareness week. The whole Catholic approach to NFP needs a massive overhaul. It simply isn’t working.

I couldn’t agree more and I highly recommend that you read her entire piece.

I’m not in agreement with her use of the term “contraceptive mentality,” but I get where she’s going. Also, she suggests that men don’t need to get the full dose of NFP instruction until after a couple is married. I think that would affect the communication aspect of NFP and I think it’s almost un-Catholic to be so hyper Puritan when discussing bodily matters. The Catholic Church is uber earthy. Just listen to the words of Consecration. But these points are all debatable and she’s spot on about the way we communicate about NFP.

I’d add two other communications issues.

1. Catholics who complain that NFP doesn’t work or is too hard are doing a service to no one. There may be shortcomings in one’s knowledge of NFP, but the method works. And NFP is certainly not the cause of marital difficulties, but perhaps a couple’s struggles with NFP can be indicative of other issues in the marriage. I recently devoted a column to this topic: NFP Is Not The Problem.

2. That said, I would agree that NFP is sometimes taught as a sort of secret code which can be difficult to decipher. Some instructors/practitioners definitely come across as though people are not responsible enough to know when they’re fertile. But somehow they should be responsible enough to raise children…?

As one woman commented to me, she and her husband were talking  about how much money she spent learning NFP and she still had to “pee on a $7 stick to know when I was fertile!”

NFP can be a great tool for couples, but they need to learn it well and it needs to be well promulgated.

My suggestion? How about an NFP Awareness Year (featured prominently on the USCCB website), including with ads like those suggested by McGuire, and instruction available throughout every diocese? – I’m definitely available for consulting on a project like this.

Another woman, who is both an NFP instructor and a marriage annulment advocate, pointed out that in her diocese there are perhaps fifteen NFP instructors and a couple hundred annulment advocates. Those numbers alone indicate why there’s a problem with contraception, divorce, and the Church’s teaching on marriage, including same-sex marriage.

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Mandatory Contraception Coverage

The Institute of Medicine and the Department of Health and Human Services are proposing mandating coverage of FDA approved contraception and sterilization by private insurance companies nationwide. Cardinal DiNardo, chair…

The Institute of Medicine and the Department of Health and Human Services are proposing mandating coverage of FDA approved contraception and sterilization by private insurance companies nationwide.

Cardinal DiNardo, chair of the US Bishops Pro-Life Committee, put out a good statement in which he noted first and foremost that fertility is not a disease. If it is, convince all the couples that are struggling with infertility, many of whom are spending tens of thousands of dollars to try and correct the problem.

It’s also interesting that this comes  just as Planned Parenthood’s legitimacy and funding are under fire. A mandate like this would keep Planned Parenthood nicely funded by private insurance. Cha-ching.

During the various discussions on healthcare, I’ve wondered about the affordability of healthcare. Make no mistake, I’m not saying that it’s cheap. But I do think that people make choices about how they spend their money and that they could choose to spend some of it on healthcare. Or not.

The Heritage Foundation just released a report on poverty in America. Sadly, those who are truly poor are eclipsed by those who fall under the broad government standards of poverty.

The average poor American has more living space than the average European, not the average poor European. The majority of poor families in the US tend to have a television, cable or satellite television, a cell phone, a computer, and a whole host of other amenities. Some will argue that technology and other goods are cheaper than they used to be and, hence, more available. That’s all fine and good, but people still have a choice of whether to spend their money on amenities or necessities like healthcare. I don’t consider contraception part of healthcare, but obviously if one has the money for extras, one also has money to pay for contraception.

In addition, many of these amenities are not one-time expenses. TVs, computers, and cell phones generally come with monthly expenses for cable or satellite, internet, voice and data plans. That all adds up to quite a bit, enough even  to pay for health insurance.

Many insurance companies already provide coverage for contraception. Federal and state governments also underwrite contraception and sterilization. Now both government and private entities would be required to cover every FDA approved form of contraception or sterilization, not just those that are more economical.

Mandating coverage also means that everyone has to support it not only through their tax dollars, but with the money that they pay for private insurance. Oh wait, not everyone pays taxes and not everyone pays for their own health insurance. But those who do, will be forced to cover practices even if said practices violate their personal and religious beliefs. Religious freedom, anyone?

Contraception is often seen as the blanket solution to unwanted pregnancies and spiraling poverty. In theory, it may sound great; but in reality it doesn’t work. Literally. The Alan Guttmacher Institute (the research arm of Planned Parenthood) reported that 46 percent of women seeking abortions were not using contraception during the month that they conceived. This means that 54 percent were using contraception and got pregnant. So either contraception is not all that effective and/or people don’t use it properly.

For me, the bigger question is when do we start to encourage personal responsibility? – Responsibility for decisions about our sexual behavior, spending, procreation, etc.

One thing’s certain, as long as no one’s responsible for anything and coverage for contraception and sterilization is mandated, Planned Parenthood will see its profits increase. (For more on PP’s profits, click here.)  And then, when the contraception fails, Planned Parenthood is there to open its cash register as a woman gets an abortion. Job security at its best.

In the meantime, it’s all the responsibility of someone else, not the individual. Certainly, not the individual woman.

Baby, you’ve come such a long way, there’s someone else taking responsibility for you.

Again.

Don’t you worry your pretty little head.

 

 

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The Case Against Alphabet Soup

Given my own alphabet collection of degrees, people are surprised when I suggest that college may not be the end all and be all. I just came across a recent…

Given my own alphabet collection of degrees, people are surprised when I suggest that college may not be the end all and be all.

I just came across a recent article by John Stossel in which he argues that college can be a scam. I couldn’t agree more.

From what I’ve seen, it seems like people often go to college or pursue graduate work when they can’t think of anything else to do. It’s a respectable, if expensive, punt.

Even at the graduate school level, I continue to meet people who have no idea of what they want to do. How smart are we/they if we/they think it’s a good idea to spend/borrow a ton of money for something which has an undefined purpose? Typically, a wise investment means knowing something about the sinkhole into which one’s throwing one’s money. Better yet, it shouldn’t even involve a sinkhole.

In the past few years, I spent almost two years witnessing the antics (yes, antics) of an ivy league school and I spent a short sabbatical at a prestigious Catholic university, both in the US. The fact that the universities are businesses aimed at generating profits was impossible to miss.Whether it was the tuition, the ridiculous book prices and requirements (always the latest version of the professor’s own textbook), or the seemingly never ending add-on costs, it was hard to get the feeling that the process was truly about education.

Don’t get me wrong. I think education is an excellent thing, I just don’t think that many institutions of higher learning are engaged in this particular endeavor. As Stossel notes, literacy rates at Harvard have fallen in the past 15-20 years. How is that possible when information is more accessible than ever before? Or is it because the information age belies the fact that access to information has little to do with understanding information and being able to use it?

If someone wants to make money, there are arguably better ways to do so than by going to college. Just ask Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg, Richard Branson, and a whole host of people with decent bank accounts.

If someone, particularly a woman, is looking for a spouse, there are less expensive and less stressful ways to do so. Here’s where colleges and universities really make their money. More than 50% of their students are women. However, this same group of students is far more likely than their male counterparts to decide to either forgo or limit their careers for their families. That’s fine, but that’s a lot of money to have spent on something that is little more than a whim. And it’s even worse if the money spent was borrowed. Then, the same women who simply wanted to get married and have a family saddle that same family with onerous debt and even have to work when they’d rather be at home with their children or perhaps work less.

It’s time for an honest discussion about higher education. It’s one thing if it’s real education in that it forms the individual and helps the individual to be a better thinker. It’s also useful if it provides a specific job skill. But when it fail at both or provides a job skill that ends up not suiting the student (e.g. lawyers who don’t want to be lawyers), then we ought to question the whole thing, particularly how much of it is supported by excessive personal debt and government subsidies.

So let’s say someone’s not ready to study beyond high school and it’s not the right time to get married. What to do? Work. Do a service project. Live abroad. Do something that makes you a better person. (Going to college won’t accomplish that.) Maybe take a few business classes at a community college and start a niche business.

Or even drop out of college:

Entrepreneur Peter Thiel, who got rich helping to build good things like PayPal and Facebook, is so eager to wake people up to alternatives to college that he’s paying students $100,000 each if they drop out of college and do something else, like start a business.

“We’re asking nothing in return other than meetings so we make sure (they) work hard, and not be in school for two years,” said Jim O’Neill, who runs the foundation.

The most indicative statistic from Stossel’s article? In the US, there are 80,000 bartenders with college degrees. Now, if those degrees represent intellectual formation, that’s one thing. If they are simply failed and expensive job training, there’s a problem. Some might even call it a scam.

 

 

 

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So Much For Quick & Easy Euthanasia

As a follow up to my recent piece on euthanasia, I thought it worth sharing this sad story on a euthanasia procedure that wasn’t as quick and trouble free as…

As a follow up to my recent piece on euthanasia, I thought it worth sharing this sad story on a euthanasia procedure that wasn’t as quick and trouble free as promised.

The patient tried to commit suicide twice before going to a clinic in Switzerland to be euthanized. Clearly, he was suffering and was not properly treated. And his final exit didn’t go smoothly either. In addition to the depression he must have been suffering, he pain was not well managed. Yet, we have the means to deal with both of these problems. This man should have been able to live with his pain under control and free from depression. Euthanasia was just a band-aid answer to hide the real issues: pain and depression.

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Euthanasia, Why Not? Love Is Stronger Than Death

The US Bishops have just issued a new document on euthanasia. We definitely needed this document. Here’s my first stab at unpacking it.

The US Bishops have just issued a new document on euthanasia. We definitely needed this document. Here’s my first stab at unpacking it.

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Thoughts On A Scandal

Over the past few weeks, as I’ve been listening to all the coverage of Congressman Weiner’s transgressions, I’ve realized that we’re at a crossroads. Read more here.

Over the past few weeks, as I’ve been listening to all the coverage of Congressman Weiner’s transgressions, I’ve realized that we’re at a crossroads.

Read more here.

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Weiner’s Women & Other Gals Who Behave Badly

I just posted a piece at CatholicVote.org commenting on a provocative column by LZ Granderson (CNN & ESPN) in which he raises the excellent question of why we rightly criticize…

I just posted a piece at CatholicVote.org commenting on a provocative column by LZ Granderson (CNN & ESPN) in which he raises the excellent question of why we rightly criticize high-profile men for misbehaving, but never their complicit and willing partners. Apparently, even in an age when women can behave as badly as men, there are still double standards. Read more here.

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