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How much is that (custom) baby in the window?

So here’s the thing. If you’re looking for something to follow that’s strange, weird, and fascinating, forget reality TV or any other fiction. Just look into the largely unregulated world…

So here’s the thing. If you’re looking for something to follow that’s strange, weird, and fascinating, forget reality TV or any other fiction. Just look into the largely unregulated world of assisted reproductive technologies (ART).

It’s all especially ironic in light of the attention given to the fact that Steve Jobs was adopted, not ordered like an iProduct.

Read more here.

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Happy World Contraception Day

Ooops, I’m late. (Pun intended.) In case you didn’t know, Monday, September 26, was “World Contraception Day,” so designated by a coalition of ten NGOs. (h/t Teresa Tomeo) Guess they…

Ooops, I’m late. (Pun intended.)

In case you didn’t know, Monday, September 26, was “World Contraception Day,” so designated by a coalition of ten NGOs. (h/t Teresa Tomeo) Guess they didn’t know that over at Grey’s Anatomy either. (Back to Grey’s in a second.)

As I’ve noted before, the Alan Guttmacher Institute (research arm of Planned Parenthood), claims that 46% of the women having abortions have not used a contraceptive during the month in which they became pregnant. In other words, 54% of the women seeking abortions used contraception the month they got pregnant.

I’m willing to accept that the fault might lie more with user error than the method, but the point is that just about every woman in the U.S. knows about contraception and has access to it. In fact, the challenge for many of us is to get through our ob-gyn visits without being pressured to use contraception. Plus, there are plenty of free clinics or you can skip a couple of fancy coffees and buy a few condoms or some contraceptive sponges at your neighborhood drug store. Access is not the problem. Personal responsibility is.

Which brings me back to Grey’s Anatomy. Kathryn Lopez drew attention to the intentionality behind the abortion story line in the last episode. Yes, that abortion was meant to happen. Character Cristina Yang (played by Sandra Oh), a surgeon with a great future before her, gets pregnant and decides to have an abortion. The start of the procedure is shown as the episode finishes. Her dutiful husband, also a surgeon, holds her hand.

First, neither of these characters are “dumb teenagers” or “disadvantaged.” They are highly educated doctors with access to the best scientific and medical information available. They have no religious affiliation, so they can’t be “duped” by their religious beliefs. Nothing about their life before marriage had anything to do with an abstinence only curriculum. And…they are married.

If they didn’t want children, they’d have the knowledge and the means (with no religious or moral scruples to hinder them) to avoid the conception of a new life.

Plus, Cristina is no stranger to pregnancy. She was pregnant in the first season and avoided an abortion since the pregnancy was ectopic and, therefore, removed. Maybe the show’s creator Shonda Rhimes forgot to write in the abstinence education and wine cooler part of surgical residency.

In all fairness, I think Rhimes has done an interesting job examining abortion and other bioethical issues in her other show, Private Practice. Yes, last season closed with an abortion, but there were a lot of other provocative and good messages in at least the past two seasons (notwithstanding the doctors’ sexual mores which appear to have nothing to do with “safe sex”). Grey’s Anatomy also had a very good episode on teenage pregnancy and adoption.

If things like “World Contraception Day” are going to be effective, then the surrounding culture has to support it. This means that people have to use contraception effectively and need to assume responsibility for their sexual behavior. If people in developing countries know what causes babies, what’s our excuse?

Maybe contraception is inherently flawed. It promotes a false sense of security, whether for the man or the woman.

A couple has a little too much to drink. Or he decides that it’s really not his problem anyway. Or she decides that she really does want a baby. Or that she really wants to get married and this is a way to force the matter. Or a gazillion other reasons.

The point is that contraception makes it seem like you don’t have to worry about long term consequences when in fact you do…all of the time, all of the month, not just on the days when you remember to take a pill or the occasional time that you remember to use a device or condom.

If contraception really worked, we wouldn’t have 54% of women seeking abortions as a result of pregnancies conceived while they were using contraception. And we wouldn’t have story lines like the recent Grey’s Anatomy episode.

Shonda Rhimes and the Alan Guttmacher Institute have done nothing to hide their beliefs in favor of contraception and abortion. But their own work belies the ineffectiveness of a culture that relies on contraception to govern sex.

Our sex drives are strong and real, sometimes unbearably strong even when wine coolers and ulterior motives are not part of the picture. Maybe contraception is not enough. Maybe we need to become more realistic about sex and all its implications.

Maybe, just maybe, sex with no strings attached creates problems regardless of contraception. Maybe sex demands ultimate vulnerability of both partners even if they are using contraception. Maybe that’s not possible with contraception.

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The Family That Prays Together Stays Together

I’ve heard this saying many times, but really didn’t know much about the history of it. Turns out it was coined by Fr. Peyton, sometime in the late 40s or…

I’ve heard this saying many times, but really didn’t know much about the history of it. Turns out it was coined by Fr. Peyton, sometime in the late 40s or early 50s. At one point, he led a rosary rally in San Francisco that reportedly drew over half a million people.

In honor of the 50th anniversary of this historic event, a Family Rosary Crusade has been organized for October 15th, again in San Francisco. More info here.

Hope you can attend or support something similar in your hometown.

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Toddlers, Tiaras, & Bad Parenting

No doubt, you’ve heard about the really troubling segments of the reality show “Toddlers and Tiaras.” (Arguably, the whole show is troubling.) One of the best commentaries I’ve seen on…

No doubt, you’ve heard about the really troubling segments of the reality show “Toddlers and Tiaras.” (Arguably, the whole show is troubling.)

One of the best commentaries I’ve seen on child pageants comes in the form of the movie Little Miss Sunshine. An unlikely pageant contestant, Olive really isn’t that cute or beautiful, and her family’s a mess. Her absurd grandfather is the only one with the bandwidth to help her prepare for the pageant. In his own way, he’s much more honest than other pageant promoters as to what the pageants are really all about, as demonstrated by the dance moves he teaches her. And her family actually turns out to be more functional than they (or we) knew they could be.

Now “Toddlers and Tiaras” makes it so very clear that there’s definitely a hypersexualized component to these contests. Read my latest here here.

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VP Biden “Understands” China’s One-Child Policy

The Vice President is on a tour in China. In a speech yesterday at a Chinese university, he said that he “understands” and is not “second-guessing” China’s one-child policy. Read…

The Vice President is on a tour in China. In a speech yesterday at a Chinese university, he said that he “understands” and is not “second-guessing” China’s one-child policy. Read more here.

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When Consumerism And Motherhood Collide

It’s a brave new world. We’re so far down the slippery slope, we don’t remember when we started sliding. Seriously. Now, the right to choose means that women can not…

It’s a brave new world. We’re so far down the slippery slope, we don’t remember when we started sliding. Seriously.

Now, the right to choose means that women can not only choose the sex and even some of the genetic traits of their infant, but it also means that they can dispose of their “products” at will. Sounds like ancient Rome to me, only this time it’s the women with the power, not the men. Read more here.

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“Meet The Press” David Gregory: Religion Shouldn’t Be More Than A Warm Fuzzy Feeling

  Before my husband and I left for church yesterday, we happened to catch part of David Gregory’s interview of Rep. Michele Bachmann on “Meet The Press.” I started paying…

 

Before my husband and I left for church yesterday, we happened to catch part of David Gregory’s interview of Rep. Michele Bachmann on “Meet The Press.”

I started paying attention to the program when Gregory asked her about her faith. (You can click on the image above for the video. The complete transcript is here.)

The nature of my work sometimes gives me the sense that we’re headed down the slippery slope, about 150 miles an hour.

Gregory’s questioning of Bachmann made me think that maybe we’re going about 180 miles/hour. I don’t expect Gregory to agree with Bachmann or any other candidate and I expect him to ask hard hitting questions. I also expect him to show some journalistic integrity and fundamental respect for religious beliefs. He displayed neither.

His questions about her perspective of wives as submissive to their husbands [Ephesians 5] were to be expected since she’d spoken openly about it and such questions are always asked when possible. She answered well. In essence, she gave an answer that’s very close to that of Aquinas who maintains that there are two types of submission: servile and economic. In the first, the submissive person looses or gives up his or her will. In the second, which applies to marriage, the submissive or submitting person agrees to acknowledge another person as the head of a particular group, whether a family, a church, a government, or even a sports team or some other organization. No one gives up his or her will, but different roles are acknowledged and accepted.

From the transcript:

REP. BACHMANN: We’ve been married almost 33 years and I have a great deal of respect for my husband. He’s a wonderful, wonderful man and a great father to our children. And he’s also filled with good advice. He…

MR. GREGORY: But so his word goes?

REP. BACHMANN: …he leads–pardon?

MR. GREGORY: His word goes?

REP. BACHMANN: Well, both of our words go. We respect each other. We have a mutual partnership in our marriage, and that’s the only way that we could accomplish what we’ve done in life is to be a good team. We’re a good team together.

Gregory goes on to ask her about her faith and her relationship in God. He can’t even hide his incredulousness and perhaps contempt.

Again, from the transcript:

MR. GREGORY: Guide has–God has guided your decisions in life. Would God guide your decisions that you would make as president of the United States?

REP. BACHMANN: Well, as president of the United States, I would pray. I would pray and ask the Lord for guidance. That’s what presidents have done throughout history. George Washington did. Abraham Lincoln did.

MR. GREGORY: But you said that Gald–God called me to run for Congress. God has said certain things about, you know, going to law school, about pursuing other decisions in your life. There’s a difference between God as a sense of comfort and safe harbor and inspiration, and God telling you to take a particular action. [Emphasis.]

REP. BACHMANN: All I can tell you is what my experience has been. I’m extremely grateful to, to have a faith in God. I, I see that God has so blessed this country. His–you know, we heard that song that he’s “shed his grace” on the United States. I believe it. He’s been very good to our country. And I think that it’s important for us to seek his guidance and to pray and to listen to his voice.

So, for Gregory, God is “[A] sense of comfort and safe harbor and inspiration,but we shouldn’t have the sense that God wants us to “take a particular action.” It sounds like Gregory mocks the very notion of the Judeo-Christian God as a real being as opposed to a fictional notion in people’s minds. Bachmann’s answer indicates that he’s also disrespecting the tradition of faith in public life in the United States.

Religion is a personal matter and no one should be forced to believe any religion. At the same time, there should be respect for different beliefs, particularly those held by millions of people for thousands of years. Jews and Christians alike have a tradition of praying to God for guidance in action. Other religious faiths have similar traditions. People who have serious religious beliefs tend not to describe God as a Hallmark card or a warm, fuzzy feeling. It’s Gregory’s prerogative not to share those beliefs, but he comes across as mocking them. And it’s definitely not his job as the host of a political show to call into question the foundation of billions of believers throughout history.

He started in the way in which he questioned her idea of submission and its role in her marriage. And while I’m not a fan of claiming media bias (despite my experience of it), the only people I see consistently challenged on their views of marriage are practicing Christians and Orthodox Jews. I don’t recall anyone asking Senator Clinton in any of her campaigns why she puts up with a philandering husband.

Then he moved to her relationship with God which he suggests should not have any real impact on her life. She did a great job of answering his questions, but he still asserts that she was less than forthcoming about her faith.

David Gregory ought to be called out for his manner of questioning. If he needs some help with etiquette I recommend that he hire Letitia Baldrige or another expert for personal instruction.

I know serious Democrats, Republicans, and Independents. I don’t know any of them who think that mocking a candidate’s religious beliefs, or those of millions of people, is fair game.

For the purposes of my work, I try and refrain from talking about political issues unless they directly concern fundamental ethical or moral issues as demonstrated by this attack (perhaps unintentional) on religious beliefs. I have no favorite candidate for 2012, although I must admit that I’d love to see a rogue Democrat challenge President Obama for the nomination.

 

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Welcome to iChurch: the Church of What’s Happening Now.

So it turns out that the term iChurch has already been appropriated for a website that helps you unblock your iPhone. I had no idea. But I think it also…

So it turns out that the term iChurch has already been appropriated for a website that helps you unblock your iPhone. I had no idea.

But I think it also works well to describe the religions or churches that we Catholics create for ourselves when we neglect to actively inform ourselves about our faith.

Read more here. As always, be sure to comment!

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